The Saffron Effect
by Amy Pond
Summary: Four one-shots about what the girls were thinking in "Our Mrs. Reynolds." Spoilers for the episode. Rated due to MINOR MINOR suggestive theme mentioned in one sentence and mild coarse language. More like K. Includes canon show couples of the episode.
1. The Right Girl

**Author's Note: **These are a series of one shots that take place during "Our Mrs. Reynolds." Firefly belongs to Joss Whedon, not me.

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><p>That moment of shock. Then the sound that escaped her lips before she could prevent it. Mal's wife. Was that who this was?<p>

She couldn't help but stare with silent awe. Mal, of all people, married? _Marred_?

She held back a scoff. Since when?

Inara studied her subtly, ignoring everyone else's colour commentary as if it were background noise. She _did_ look a bit familiar. One of the girl's from Triumph, perhaps?

Inara pursed her lips.

The girl was too skinny. Quite meek. She probably hadn't had a decent meal in her life. It looked like someone had given her her last haircut with a sword. And who _knew_ when the last time she bathed was! It wasn't as if Triumph was known for its cleanliness.

Well…

Well, then, she supposed all that was left to do was to wish the girl the best of luck. After all, being Mal's wife couldn't be easy.

Mal was a lot to handle. He had _no_ understanding of the word privacy. And he was arrogant. Arrogant to the point of reckless stupidity. No match for such a meek little girl. Inara would be better matched to marry some of her _clients_ than Mal and this girl.

Mal needed someone stronger of heart and of will. Someone who knew just how to put him on his place. ...Someone who had put more investment in him than a day!

Inara took some deep breaths. Tried to calm herself, clear her mind using some of the techniques she'd been taught in training. She attempted to pay attention again, and listened as the explanation took place.

She supposed now it made more sense. Why he picked this girl, this _Saffon_. Why they didn't fit. And now it didn't matter. After all, it wasn't a _real_ marriage.

Somehow, that didn't make her feel any more comfortable.


	2. The Bee On Fire

River lay, staring at the sky. She could see it, see the stars beyond the metal of her cell. Calling out, wondering why no one could ever just come outside. Its only friends were made of metal. Cold, metal beasts with nothing to offer it.

She felt bad for the sky. No person ever dared reach its hand to the sky.

She puffed up her cheeks until they were as wide with air as she could fill them. She blew the air out with a low whistle.

She hated this. Being confined to her room. Simon could never let her rest. Always made her sleep.

Rest. Restless. Legs like nests for fire ants.

She stood up slowly, walking gracefully to the wall. She pressed her cheek against the cool metal of the wall, her hand coming up to lean next to it.

Shhh. She needed to hear.

She needed to hear the girl like flames.

The girl was buzzing. Buzzing like a bee on fire. Alight in the inferno and not even aware of it. Just kept on buzzing. Darting about. Bouncing back like a rubber ball when it hit a wall. Mindless drone of the hive. Silly little bee.

She should tell Simon about the bee. She really should.

But she wouldn't.

She smiled. They would hop around. Bunnies at the puppet show. Then, like they always did, they would fight. And they would win. And then they would soak in their own foolishness and regret.

A small bit of sisterly vengeance. She'd say nothing.

That's what he would get for locking her up.


	3. The Wife Who Cared Quietly

Zoe's mind raced as she went to bed early.

Who did Saffron think she was, just waltzing in here like the perfect little wife?

Being a wife didn't mean doting on your husband, waiting on him hand and foot. It was about more than that. Of course, Saffron wouldn't get that.

Zoe had known Mal for years, and she _knew_ he wasn't thick enough to buy into Saffron's little act. He'd stick to his guns and dump her ass the second they got to Beaumond.

Kicking off her boots, Zoe moved to the bed stiffly. She laid back though she was still in her clothes.

After all, what reason would Mal have to change his mind? It wasn't like she was servicing him in every way he would allow, treating him like a gorram king.

. . .

Did men like that? Being waited on hand and foot by their wives? Did they like the wives that cooked and cleaned for them? The wives that made everything about the man they loved and no one else? The wives that were all fragile and emotional? That cared so openly?

Especially when the other option was a complete opposite. A wife that was cold. That took care of herself. A wife that cared, but cared quietly.

Her eyes darted to the ceiling.

Who wouldn't want a wife like Saffron? Even Wash was…

Zoe rolled over, laying her head on her palm. She was being silly. Wash loved her and she knew it. They may not be a conventional couple, an expected couple, not like Saffron would expect to see on her backwater planet.

But they were good. They loved each other. They worried together when there was danger. They laughed together, cried together, laid together.

And until now, it always enough.

But hearing Wash talk today. Would he like her better if she cooked for him?

He just...he seemed so happy. Excited by the idea of what Saffron did, and completely and utterly oblivious to how terribly idiotic she was. How primitive and pathetic her idea of marriage was.

Zoe hoped Wash had really known her when he married her. That he would have seen this coming, and taken her for all she was. She was _never_ going to be the wife that cooked, or gave him a foot rub at the end of a long day. And she wasn't planning to change. Not for him, and not for anyone. She was perfectly happy with herself.

It would have to be enough that she worried any time he got within a hair's breadth danger. When they passed Reavers in the sky. When they were being chased, and he had to fly them around hairpin turn after hairpin turn.

She was a good soldier. She looked after everyone on the ship. But, in a completely separate way, with a side she didn't show, she looked after Wash. Wash was different. Even though she didn't show it, she knew it. She didn't forget it. She never would until the day she died.

She hoped that would be okay. To be the wife who cared quietly.


	4. The Mysterious Ways of Men

As Kaylee lay in her bunk later, she couldn't help but think of Saffron. Saffron thought she was getting a husband. What she got was Mal. And Mal, being Mal, didn't want any of her.

Men could be so stupid sometimes. They could be rude. And sometimes, they could just be completely oblivious. Even when girls practically laid it out for them, they couldn't tell the meaning from a titanium current glider. Kaylee scoffed. Just...men! Tian xiao de!

On a completely unrelated note, she wondered about Simon. Did he think Saffron was pretty? Would _he_ have accepted her marriage? After all, he was a gentleman.

She grinned softly. No. Simon wouldn't do that. He'd stumble and stutter in awkward shock, tripping over his words until someone explained everything to him.

And, then of course, he'd say something stupid.

She frowned. He'd mess up just like Mal had, Kaylee was sure. Make her feel bad for doing nothing wrong. It was like a disease. What _was_ wrong with men?

She heard a soft tap on her door, the metal sound echoing hollowly in the bunk.

"Yep," she said.

"It's me."

Simon.

Beaming, she hurried to open up the door and climb out of her bunk.

"Heya. What's happening?"

"Oh. Oh, nothing. I just..." He took a long pause. "So, Mal's married? Funny, isn't it? I always thought he'd be the last of us. ...Well actually, no. I thought Jayne would be last. If ever. Although River is still pretty young-"

"-Simon?"

"...What?"

Kaylee sighed softly.

"Oh, nothing. It just sounded like you were gonna say somethin' is all."

Simon didn't say anything further. After about a day had gone by, Kaylee felt the need to fill the silence. "Yeah, it's all pretty crazy. Kinda feel bad for the girl, though. Way Mal's treating her."

Simon's chest rose and fell. "Well, that's our captain."

As another silence began, Kaylee cut it off in its tracks.

"...Day's kinda tired me out. Excitement and all. I think I'm gonna rest a bit. Can't tell day and night out here anyway."

"Of course. Don't let me keep you."

With a nod, she turned to lift her door back up.

"I, uh...I wanted to apologize," Kaylee paused as he spoke, "...about before."

Kaylee turned, one hand still on the door, forehead wrinkling. "Before?"

"Yeah. Back on that planet before. ...When I called Serenity luh-suh-?"

"Oh, that?" Kaylee grinned, waving it off. "That was days ago."

"Yes, I'm aware, but... I suppose I just never apologized properly."

Kaylee laughed. "Oh...you. You always need to be so proper about everything. I mean it's nice, but...you don't, you know?" Simon stared, not catching her meaning. She smiled. "Forget about it. We're shiny."

Simon stared again before finally continuing.

"It's really not luh-suh! I mean...I know you work...so hard. You do such a good job-"

"-Let me stop you before you say something _else_ you regret. 'Kay?"

"Okay." Simon smiled awkwardly. "Good, er...day, then."

"Good day."

Kaylee grinned as she returned to her bunk. Men could be _really_ dumb sometimes. But other times...they were just really, really good.

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><p><em>tian xiao de<em> – "for the love of all that's holy"

_luh-suh_ – "crappy"


End file.
